Tanya was persistent and she was the kind of a lady who got whatever she wanted anytime she put her heart to it. She also had an overbearing attitude which I couldn’t stand some times. Kehinde on the other hand was the exact opposite of Tanya. She fell in love too easily and was a pushover but she had a lovely character and a charisma to be admired not to mention that she was very beautiful. Tanya pushed me on a small stool in front of my dressing mirror then ordered Kehinde who had come with her makeup kit to give me a make over. I was forced to dress up and after several group selfies by Kehinde who was also a selfie addict, our Uber arrived and soon we were on our way to the club.

After joining the queue outside, we were finally let into the club. As soon as we entered, heads began to turn in our direction and I tried not to meet any gazes, all I wanted was to go back home and I had made up my mind that I wasn’t going to dance or give any guy an audience, I was just going to sit in a corner and while away time till my friends grew weary and asked to call it a night. I wanted to go to the couch at the rear but my friends refused and nudged me towards the bar. They claimed that the bar was an open place where admirers could easily see you. Kehinde kept sending flirty smiles around while Tanya left us for the dance floor. I rolled my eyes and simply sipped my drink.

I turned to ask for another drink when I felt a hand on my back. When I turned to see who it was, I realized that it was a man grinning at me and dressed in an agbada. Jeez! Who wore agbada to a club?

“Hello baby.” He said, still grinning. Not only was his yoruba accent strong, his perfume was almost choking.

“Kindly remove your hand from my back, sir.” I told him, not pleased with such a bold attitude at all.

He removed his hand, pulled the sleeves of his agbada up to his shoulders and then came around and sat down on Tanya’s stool in front of me. “Baby, how are you?” He asked, chuckling and ogling me. “I was just sitting in that corner there when I saw an angel. So I said, let me not miss this heaven…” Then tapped the county with his palm. “Bar man, give the lady extra drink.”

“Thank you sir but I can pretty well handle my own.” I stated.

“Okay…” He said, adjusting the arms of his agbada again. “What’s this beautiful angel’s name?”

“Victoria.” I said reluctantly.

“Victoria!” He exclaimed then laughed aloud. “That’s a very beautiful name, eh… Very beautiful… How about we get to know each other very well?”

I hesitated. I was really in no mood and this kind of man’s company was the very last thing I needed but I didn’t want to be impolite. “Like I’ve said, the name is Victoria. I’m from Imo state and I work in Oasis Firm.”

“Ha! Omo ibo ni yen… (Ha! That means that you are an Igbo girl) He gave one of his annoying laughter. “I like igbo girls… Ha! Beni!” He nodded, adjusting the sleeves again and I wondered if he was ever going to stop adjusting them. It was annoying the way he kept lifting his arms. “Igbo girls are not only beautiful, they can cook very well. Edikaikong soup, Afang soup, just mention it and they are number one!”

“I’m sure that you meant Calabar girls.” I corrected.

“Ehen…” He paused to think then indifferently said. “Ehn, it does not matter, as long as they both know how to cook. “Ermmm… My name is Chief Gabriel Owonikoko Ifajaiye 1, I’m a business man and have companies scattered all around Nigeria. I have five wives, three concubines and twenty six children.”

I was taken aback. “That’s a large family. Wait a minute… Didn’t you say that your name is Gabriel?”

“Yes, my very close friends call me Gabo.”

“I see… That name shows that you are a Christian, how come you have five wives? Isn’t it supposed to be one man to one wife?”

A small frown creased his features now. “Ehn… And so? Why would I have the kind of wealth I have and stick to one woman? Don’t you even know that there are more women in the world than men? If I marry only one, who will marry the rest? Since God has blessed me with wealth and told me to go into the world and multiply, that’s exactly what I’m doing!” He chuckled.

“I don’t get it. How did a priest or pastor wed you to your other wives despite knowing that you are married?” I asked.

“Shioorrr!” He flinched his mouth at me then said, “traditional marriage has no limit for wives. White wedding is not our thing, it was the white men that brought that here to Africa. Even if I marry extra wives, who’s a pastor to stop me? Not when my large tithe is helping his church grow! See, my dear, let me tell you my dear, things are very easy in this country as long as you have money. If you just give some pastors some change, they will do as you want. Me I’m still borrowing some parts of the old testament. After all, I’m even innocent compared to uncle Solomon in the Bible. How that man did not die from high blood pressure still baffles me till today o. If my second and fifth wife should start their madness like this, I just quickly sneak out of my house to enjoy myself with one of my concubines in my guest house.”

I was finally finding him interesting, although not attractive. The bulge of his paunch was very visible through his agbada and besides his numerous wives, strong accent and mentality, I could deduce that he was only a secondary school leaver and had not really furthered his studies but somehow, he had ended up rich. Since he was a talkative, I decided that he would be a good way to while away the night.

“So tell me, did you come with any of your wives or Concubines to the club?” I asked.

“Haha!” He laughed deeply, his hands on his paunch. “That’s like shooting myself in the leg. Mi o le koba ara mi…( I can’t implicate myself).” He said. “I came here to entertain myself and catch a new fish. See, all my wives are no longer attractive, no matter how much make up they put on. Child birth has turned them upside down. The stretch marks are unbearable. The only person who’s still very manageable is my third wife… She goes to the gym and her flat stomach has returned a bit. The others, shioorrr! It’s only to sit at home, eat, watch zeeworld and finish my money. Their stomachs are big as if they are pregnant and me I can’t have this big belle and also have wives that have big belle. Two captains cannot be in charge of a ship o.”

For the first time, I laughed hard. I had never met anyone this funny. “Chief, but what more could you want. If you could have five wives and still be this discontented, then nobody can help you.” I told him.

“If I can make seven women very happy, I can make more very happy noni.” He answered

“What do you mean?” I asked.

“I want to go and see your family.” He said flatly.

I frowned now. “Pardon?”

He adjusted his sleeves once again. “Eh, I have checked you out very well and I can see that you won’t end up like my wives. Besides, I like working class ladies like you, just that once I marry you, you’ll have to stop working for that your boss and I’ll open up your own business for you wherever you want it in Lagos.”

I smiled a bit and shook my head. “Chief, thank you but I don’t want to get married now, especially not to a pologamous man. I’m not ready to die yet.”

He stared at me in surprise. “Ahan, are you serious? How will you say that you don’t want to get married? When there are millions of girls out there praying for a man to come and marry them and here you are doing shakara.” He said.

“Chief, I’m not the millions of girls, I’m me. I am not interested in your marriage proposal.”

“O ma ga o.” He said in wonder. “Wa na, how old are you sef?”

I sipped my drink through the straw. “Chief, what has age got to do with it?”

“I’m just surprised na that you’ll turn me down. Do you know how many women flirt with me on daily basis. Even my secretary Shade that is married will be wearing short short skirt and shaking her buttocks when leaving my office so that I will notice her.”

“Ehn chief, go and marry Shade then.”

“Never! Her backyard is too big! When she sits down, the sides of her buttocks sag because they can’t contain her bazuka! Do you know how many chairs that girl has broken in my office?”

“But chief, I thought men like it big.”

“Not me o… I can not come and kill myself by myself. What’s so special about big buttocks? Iso lo wa n be, nothing else! (It’s full of fart, nothing else!)” He said and I laughed again.

I was really enjoying his company and I began to feel light now. No longer did I regret letting my friends force me to the club. I was still enjoying the short moment of silence when chief finally broke it by clearing his throat.

“Eh, do you know that you have totally changed my perception, iwo omo yi? (You this girl)”

“About what?” I curiously asked.

He glanced at the dancefloor at other girls dancing with a look of disgust on his face and said, “I used to think that any girl you find in a club was wayward and only looking for attention, or more, a man to spend the night with. But, from just being with you for these few minutes, I have studied you gidigan (very well), and I can see that you are not after a man’s money or looking for someone to take you to bed… If it’s most girls that I have met, many would have been giving me all those pepeye (duck) eye and smile, praising me so ori mi ma wu (so my head could swell from the praises), some will even be caressing my big stomach and be telling me just how sexy it is whereas I know that she’s only fooling me.”

I chuckled. “So what made you concluded so quickly about me?”

“You did not even let me buy you a drink, neither did you ask for my complimentary card. Even after telling you that I want to marry you, you still refused.”

“Well, that’s just me.” I shrugged a shoulder. “Let’s just say that I have had my fair share of unhappiness in life and I’m not looking forward to going back to it anytime soon.”

“Well said!” He agreed and then glanced over my shoulder to look at someone as he said, “Eh my dear, pardon my question o, but do you know that man over there? He has been staring at us since.”

“Who?” I asked, turning my head.

“That one on white t-shirt.” He pointed and when my eyes fell upon the person he had described, my heart almost jumped into my mouth……

To be continued….. Watch out for Episode 18